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Do family traditions always go according to the husband’s family?

The Rav Name: Rabbis of the Da’at Institute

I know family traditions go according to the husband’s family, but what about a female tradition from the wife’s mother? Such as: My mother lights Shabbos candles from oil and his lights with candles. Also, she only lights two candles when traveling, while my mother-in-law lights the same amount as usual.
Who’s tradition do I follow?

Thank you!

halom and thank you for your question! Yes it is written that Abraham went back to Beer Sheva, where he had received instructions from G-d. It is also true that Sarah died in Hevron. The commentary of the Ramban (Nachmanides,) maintains that Sarah must have passed away at a later stage, since they would not have lived in separate places. According to this opinion G-d had given Abraham instructions to be in Beer Sheva.

Regarding the placement of Rivkah’s birth before the fact that Milcah bore Nachor eight children, there is a principle in Torah interpretation that the Torah does not necessarily follow chronological order, since it comes to teach, not as a narrative. In this case it could be that Rivkah’s birth is mentioned earlier because of it’s significance, since she was the second matriarch.

Sources

“והנראה בעקידה שהייתה הצואה בה בבאר שבע, כי שם היה דר ושם חזר, כי כן כתוב בתחילה (לעיל כא לג) ‘ויטע אשל בבאר שבע ויקרא שם בשם ה’ אל עולם’ ואמר (שם) ‘ויגר אברהם בארץ פלשתים ימים רבים’, והוא גרותו בבאר שבע שהוא בארץ פלשתים, ושם נצטווה בעקידה, ועל כן שהה בדרך שלשה ימים, שארץ פלשתים רחוקה מירושלים, שאילו חברון בהר יהודה הוא … ובשובו מן העקידה לבאר שבע חזר, כמו שנאמר (לעיל כב יט) ‘וישב אברהם אל נעריו ויקומו וילכו יחדו אל באר שבע וישב אברהם בבאר שבע’, להורות שנתעכב שם וישב בו שנים. ואם כן לא מתה שרה באותו זמן, כי לא היה אברהם דר בבאר שבע ושרה דרה בחברון”.

(רמב”ן)

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Do family traditions always go according to the husband’s family?

Sources

DAAT CENTER - JUDAISM IN THE LIGHT OF KABALA AND CHASSIDUS

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