In order that you will understand the answer we need to get ahead and explain the special place that exists in each and every one of us.
Everyone in the world has a role, a mission, a meaning, unique only to him. He has a “self-place” that is not conditioned by anything.
Having briefly explained this complete place we can also understand what is the right way that the whole place will not be harmed — and even be perfected — from the environment.
This matter is written in the preface to the Tanya.
The Alter Rebbe clarifies that although the Torah belongs to every Jew and was inherited to all the Jews as a people and also to every single Jew, that it is written in the Torah: “a particular mitzvah to which he feels a special belonging, and a particular passage or a part of the Torah to which he feels a deeper connection and a more inner belonging.”
As it is narrated in the Gemara, one of the Amoraim asked his friend: “In which mitzvah was your father the most careful?”
His friend replied: “mitzvat tzizit.”
The Baal Shem Tov mentions this story and explains that the word "careful" also means "radiance" - “light,” and according to this interpretation the intention of the question was: Which mitzvah illuminated your father's soul in a special way?
To what mitzvah did he feel a deeper soul connection, which in any case influenced him to keep it in a more elegant way?
This is the inner content the Baal Shem alluded to in the "HaYom Yom":
In order to illuminate a certain thing — to exhaust and discover its true content — we must first know its "Raz" or secret. What is its inner depth and unique meaning?
Everyone has their own style and character which are different from their friends.
Every person has a natural and basic need for their own lifestyles in a way that is unique for them.
Every person has an inner need to be special and different from others.
Of course the right way, is the way of the Torah.
The Creator created us and it is He who knows what is the true way of life that is suitable for each of us. This way He has given us through the Torah and mitzvot.
But every Jew has a different part of the Torah and a different mitzvah that 'belongs’ to him especially.
Hashem created humans in such a way that each has a unique strength, which is different from all the others.
The unity required between all, does not mean that all private reality is nullified and void, and should be ignored.
More than that - a person's true recognition of what he had inside, and in his strengths, or on the other hand his limitations, precisely allows him to unite in true union with others.
The problem starts when a person wants to have the only virtue. This desire arises in him because he is missing self-esteem. So if he recognizes in his friend a certain strength in which his friend surpasses him, it seems to him that the strengths in the other diminishes his value, and he can't reach a peaceful union with him.
If a person recognizes that the true value is given from the Creator he will understand that its value doesn't depend on others at all and in any case, does not offend him.
When the virtues of others are not a threat to him, he will be able to feel and respect the place of others and their self exaltation.
Moreover, he will be open and ready to be influenced by him and his unique virtues, and he too will act to give to his friend and influence him from his own virtues.
In contrast, a person who denies his friend or his place, actually degrades the uniqeness given to him. If a person claims the other is worthless, his words actually express a lack of faith in the true value given to him by the Creator.
In summary, it is found that cancelling these feelings and recognizing that the value is given from above, not conditioned by anything, give a person true peace, and thanks to them he is able to give everyone their place without feeling threatened.
On the other hand, the choice to view ones strengths without seeing that they come from the Creator, causes a person to be threatened by the very reality of others.
Living with this recognition that our self place is our special gift, then we can be calm and safe, without pressure from the environment, and use our energy to influence and illuminate the world.
The sources for the answer:
